Atonal
Angels wept.
Demons cheered.
Never before had they been witness to an entity conducting such a symphony of agony, so mind numbingly brutal that the creature suffering under it could no longer be identified as that of a human or animal.
It was a melody of remorseless savagery, punctuated by atonal strains of suffering.
As the entity paused for a moment, its victim was heard to whisper, “Have mercy.”
The entity leaned in close to its victim and took a deep breath while the assembled angels and demons prepared for extinction. They knew when this entity answered the plea, that the power of its words could obliterate the universe.
“No.”
The word came out unexpectedly sweet.
“No, your critique was fine,” she said to the well-dressed man standing in front of her. Her smiling face and nice tone caught him off guard, and he shifted uncomfortably.
“I felt that perhaps I was too harsh when I wrote my original thoughts about your work,” he explained to her as he took another sip of his chardonnay. “On second look, I think that you might have an imagination after all.”
“You have no idea,” she smiled.
Amanda Bergloff
Amanda Bergloff is a science fiction/fantasy writer with stories published by Darkhouse Books (“Stories from the World of Tomorrow”) and World Weaver Press (“Frozen Fairy Tales”). She loves all things pop-culture–paints and writes daily–reads obsessively. The interior of her mind looks like 1950s sci fi pulp art–and I’m on a quest to write and post an original story a week on my website: http://abergloff2.wix.com/abergloffwriter.
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Cute, though only authors may be able fully to appreciate the painful humor. Two tweaks to weigh: make the author’s plea “possibly heard to whisper” and maybe drop the initial “No” in the author’s acceptance speech. But cute, for sure. AGB
Ha! Not what I was expecting at all!
Absolutely wonderful!
Nice twist easily recognized by anyone who has ever relied on someone else’s approval. Very clever and funny story from suspenseful start to witty finish. Bravo!
Nice bit of fun!
Write on, Amanda!
I truly enjoyed it! Well done!!